I've always felt as though whenever something bad happened to me, in order to deal with it, i would just push it aside and leave it tucked away somewhere. I've always held it in. Told myself to worry about other people's issues instead of my own, to never give myself the chance to fall apart, because once it happens, it becomes a tendency, and it will happen over and over again. I told myself to practice being strong instead. So i guess what I'm trying to say is that i was wrong. We as people always do this, we hate to feel helpless, and to feel like our lives are going downhill, so instead of wallowing in self pity we put the problems in the back of our minds and plaster the fake smile on our faces. But once in a while, i think we all need that breaking point, that point where we realize that those things aren't ever going to be what we hoped they'd be. Not ever. For anybody. And thats okay. Its fine to spend a night in your room with the sad music blasting.  In fact, its healthy for you. Healthy to let all the compiled feelings, and stress and loneliness just leave your body.I feel hypocritical telling you this, because it's hard for me. I'm rarely the girl who cries. I drown myself in the problems of other people to make mine seem nominal, or nonexistent. And i guess i try to make my life feel like its full, and that if i can help other people instead of myself, i must be doing great. But i'm not doing great. Im breaking more and more everyday. So for anyone who takes all of their anger, their sadness and whatever emotions they might be feeling and pushes them into the back of their minds, let it out. It feels better than you think.

- I Go By Alli @ 8:34 pm

day two; your first love

 

"I love you," he whispers. She replied through the tears, "But you don't wanna keep me, do you?"

My first love was Jimmy Eblan. Most of the planet already knows that. I dont regret a minute spent with him, and hopefully i never do.I have made too many mistakes to ever have anything close to a friendship with him again, and i guess im going to have to cope with that. For right now i still consider him the best thing that has ever happened to me, and to him, its most likely a completely different story.

Day one; Introduce yourself

Hi, my name is Allison Blythe D'Amico. The apostrophe in my name is useless. I love board games, rollerblading and chalk. I act like a little kid and spend my weekends goofing around with my friends instead of getting shitfaced.  I'm terrified of the dark, and who is hiding behind my shower curtain, and dont like to be alone. I like acoustic music and techno stuff i can put on full blast in the car. I wish i could make facial expressions like Nicki Minaj, and have a terrible voice.  I love being with my best friends and driving around in a car full of kids, windows down, music blasting around a town too small for me. I'm sarcastic, and like to make people laugh, i laugh more than i cry, and hopefully that stays that way. This is starting to sound a lot like myspace.